Tuesday, October 11, 2016

AP Writing Warmup: George Gasciogne's "For That He Looked Not upon Her" (10/12/16)


Bell Ringer Activity:
For today's class, you read three AP English essays on George Gasciogne's poem, "For That He Looked Not Upon Her," from the 2015 student essay pool.  I told you yesterday that "one was a high example, one was a low example, and one was a medium example."

In the comments section below, tell us what score you gave each essay and why.  Since our class time is limited, you don't need to describe everything about the essay, just the big things you think the student did right using the scoring rubric I gave you yesterday.

[ Note: I have posted a picture of a constellation above to illustrate the big message I want you to learn about the College Board's policy for scoring AP essays: as a writer, you will be rewarded for what you do right on a whole, not every little thing you did wrong. ]



12 comments:

  1. 1A- 9: This essay was well written and did exactly what was required to do. The writer made sure to use devices to show the speaker's complex attitude.
    1B- 6: This essay was also well written but it didn't have as much detail. There was also a lot of mistakes that the writer made and tried to fix, and they ended up making the essay harder to read.
    1C- 2: There was barely any detail in this essay. It was also really hard to read and was not organized.

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  2. 1A: I scored this one the highest of all the essays. I gave this one an 8, because I thought the student did a very good job at describing and giving examples of the devices used. They were able to write about all three with many examples from the poem.
    1B: I scored this essay with a 5. They were able to give examples of the devices, but didn't go in depth to what they meant.
    1C: I scored this essay with a 6. Like the first one they were able to give many examples of imagery, form and diction, but could have gone deeper into their meaning.

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  3. I gave essay 1A an 8, because I thought this student made a strong argument and really met the goal of both the primary focus and secondary focus.
    Essay 1B got a score of 6 from me. This student met the goals, although it wasn't as strong as 1A. They used quotes and discussed the structure of the poem well.
    I gave essay 1C a 4, because although the student used quotes and went into detail, I feel like they didn't completely hit the goal of the prompt.

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  4. For essay number one, I gave it a 7. The writer seemingly had a full understanding of the poem, stayed on topic throughout the entire thing, and filled each example with details. Though consistent errors occurred, I can tell the writer had the same mindset as I did.

    For number two I scored it with a 5. The writer first tried to press the whole poem into the first paragraph, then filled the second with quotes from the poem, but the third was well put and made fair arguments as to the meaning of each section, using words such as "imagery" and "emotion".

    I gave the last one a seven. Though hard to read, the writer made good points using quotes to defend his argument. He stayed on topic and used descriptive language.

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  5. I have essay 1A a score of 8 because the poem analysts and discussion was thorough and precise. I believe, the essay was also exceptionally persuasive in their ideas.
    Essay 1B got a 5 because their ideas were a bit scattered and at times confusing. I think they could have been a bit more descriptive.
    For the final essay 1C, I scored it with a 6 because they correctly quoted the poem and went into good descriptive detail about their quote. They also had great ideas and reflections on the poem, itself.

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  6. For essay 1A I scored them an 8 because as a whole I thought it all flowed together really nicely. They had convincing evidence to support their claims and the entirety of the essay was very clear.
    For essay 1B I scored them a 5 because it wasn't as clear as but still had a lot of convincing evidence and a claim.
    For essay 1C I scored them a 6 because I think they had some really good evidence to support their claim but kind of crammed it all together and didn't explain much in detail.

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  7. 1A-Well written with good handwriting and strong vocabulary. Uses lots of quotes and wrote a lot for the amount of time given. Discusses all points of the question and in depth. 8

    1B- Discusses all points in some depth but lacks a conclusion. 6

    1C- Not as well written as the first two. Very difficult for me to read. 3

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  9. I gave the first essay a 9. I did this because the student clearly had a thorough understanding of the sonnet and explained the speakers conflicting emotions very well. I gave the second essay a 3. I did this because the second essay did not elaborate on any of the main topics and only talked generally about the sonnet and its contents. I gave the third essay a 6. I did this because this essay does talk about the speakers complex attitude and elaborates a little but is not very thorough and does not give many strong points or examples.

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  10. 1A: I gave student A an 8 because he/she used a lot of sophisticated words and that student also gave some good examples of the poem that could really show she understood the poem.

    1B: for the second essay i read i gave student B a 6 it was a real good essay but feel like there was something missing.You can tell the student understood the questions asked and that the student also understood the poem but didn't use much evidence to support that she understood

    1C: For the final essay i gave student C a 4 they had a lot of evidence supporting that the student understood something but not everything

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  11. 1A: I gave this essay a 9 because I thought the writer met all the expectations by using literary devices to analyze the speakers complex attitude.

    1B: Although this essay met some expectations of the prompt you can tell by the marks on the paper they did not do any prewriting nor did they use as many details as the first. That is why I gave this essay a 5.

    1C: This essay was very hard to grade because the handwriting was very hard to read. Since I was not able to understand the whole essay I only scored it as a 3.

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  12. I scored Essay 1A an 8 because the writer's vocabulary is astounding. It is written well and the writer explains the quotes thoroughly. The writer has a third world connection with the speaker's emotions in the poem.
    I scored Essay 1B a 6 because it is structured, however it doesn't flow. They describe what what the form, theme, and imagery is; however, they do not really connect to the real world and rely too much of the text of the poem.
    I scored Essay 1C a 3 because the writer did not fully follow through with explanations. He missed out a lot from the prompt. I don't really think he understands what form does for a poem.

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